Its been a long time, shouldnta left you, left you

6 days post examination freedom, I find myself not actually feeling relieved or free. Perhaps it is the burden of knowing I have to move out of my student accommodation within the next 4 days; to pack up my life as I known it for the past 10 months :( Or maybe it is the notion that this summer won't really be one of freedom, where every day has no particular motive until Sara messages me our plan of action for the day. Instead this summer, hopefully.....

yoos' big things in Jesus name.

Rather amazingly, after months of writing cover letters and sending my CV to anonymous recipients over the Internet, I managed to score 3 work opportunities over the summer. Just like the 23 bus, when you wait ages for one, three come at once. Thankful? Yes am I, thankyou for asking. I'll be working with PhD students to dye human cells as part of a new research into alternative cancer treatment and also *it's alot isn't it* in a chemical laboratory fiddling with equipment. This means for a parts of summer, I shan't be in London. For the first time, I shall be living independently from any other housemates- a true working woman. And even, dare I say it, without internet. This might just be what I need, a taste of the independent life, some time to reflect I think where I appear to be heading in life and most importantly time with God. Recently, I find myself searching for God in all the wrong places if not, avoiding his face, wishing material satisfaction actually gave satisfaction. But that's not the way forward. If you've behaved with such nonsensicality [yes, new English word, check your dictionaire] as me before you'll understand what usually occurs is that you, on your wide path of worldliness and less concern for God trip and fall. Once you've hit the floor you look around for God. I say why let it get to that point. At least if you constantly consult your saviour and then things appear to go wrong you know that

'All things work together for the good of those that love the Lord 'Romans 8:28

: its all good shorty. But if you, who no longer appreciates the jeans you spent two notes last weekend,

have that i am my own man attitude, trust God will show different.

On a lighter note, I can't wait to hit up London and even Canterbury again to receive some inspiration. Not that there definitely isn't at the moment, it's just that I'm just not in that frame of mind. An actual break/severing from university campus is required. But once I do, ooo its on. Marker pen, common place book, charcoal pencil, sketch pad and Pentax p30 is at the ready.